22. a€?i am on Tinder to produce company in the same way i am on Pornhub observe the local plumber maintenance the sink.a€?
Straightforward synopsis of myself: a€“ Daddy dilemmas a€“ fast declining self-confidence a€“ extremely possessive and jealous a€“ crisis queen a€“ Gold-digger.a€?
Love partying and outdoorsy information
24. a€?we’ll get friends hating me personally while we controls every facet of yourself. Exactly what are your waiting around for?a€?
Provide sexual pleasure when wanted 3
26. a€?Half-Filipino, Half-German, Physics biggest. I really like laughing, dogs, quite a few dishes, alcohol, outdoor tasks and adventures. My personal story book prince was someone who try tall, great and is willing to end up being roofied and anally penetrated by the next date. I could getting a few, topped with sarcasm and sprinkles of bullshit.a€?
28. a€?2nd 12 months mindset scholar, therefore I’ll enter your mind before providing you with mind. Gymnast, and so I’m flexible (bring your conclusions).a€?
29. a€?Reasons to swipe right and girlfriend me personally… 1. I’ve no gag reflex 2. i really like maintaining 4. i will make dinners fit for your diet needs 5. You shouldn’t ask questions unless a€?Are your starving?’ or, a€?Can We lay on they?’ 6. When you are 
mates, i will not call or writing unless it is filthy selfies or dinner needs 7. My personal # 1 priority is the delight and welfare 9. Just talk whenever talked to 10. I take Swipe appropriate .a€?
30. a€?If you can’t handle myself inside my worst, after that keep because I don’t have a best. I am usually awful.a€?
33. a€?Our partnership need like a Nintendo 64a€“classic, fun to invest many hours with and each problem effortlessly solved by blowing upon it after that shoving they back.a€?
34. a€?If you prefer necessary protein shakes and having caught on fitness center, if you should be perhaps not into CrossFit, when you have half a brain, if you want producing increases at midnight, while curling in squat rack, i am the like you’ve looked for, content myself and start to become swole m8.a€?
36. a€?I’m not sure who you are. I’m not sure what you want. If you are searching for a relationship. I could show There isn’t cash. Exactly what i really do bring is actually a rather particular set of techniques. Abilities We have obtained over a long intimate profession. Abilities which make myself a dream for people like you. Should you decide swipe left now that’ll be the end of it. I shall not choose you, I shall maybe not pursue your. But if your swipe right , i’ll complement along with you, i’ll flirt with you and I also will f**k you.a€?
37. a€?we hunt, seafood, review porn and carefully delight in acquiring stoned in forest with Mary Jane and Jack. I am able to nail an arrow at the back of the head in excess of 100 yards. I will make like Martha and swallow like Kim K. Swipe appropriate .a€?
38. a€?Let’s recreate the human being Centipede and sew the mouth area to my personal butthole. PS: all I devour is actually mozzarella sticks, Doritos and di*k.a€?
39. a€?I am not the sort of lady you need to hold in farts for but instead the type of girl you need to control farts for.a€?
40. a€?Don’t judge me on my era. I just want a man to buy me personally flowers, deliver me personally a million cute messages and give me a call my own. I’ll push you to be ingredients thus wife me upwards.a€?
41. a€?I’ve discovered that boys has two thoughts: hungry and sexy… Easily view you without a hardon, I’ll turn you into a sandwich.a€?
43. a€?i recently need some 1980’s flick romance. That’s all. We swear I am not that difficult please. You need to be John Cusack outside my personal window with a boombox.a€?